The Lies We Told
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Because I could see it in their faces, how it changed them.
It was something I saw in their eyes—a new awareness, I suppose— that hurt me most. So when finally, finally , our miracle happened, it was the most amazing, most joyful thing imaginable. That moment when I held Hannah in my arms for the first time was one of pure elation. We loved her so much, Doug and I, right from the beginning.
I put it down to my tiredness, the shock and stress of new motherhood, or a hundred other different things rather than admit the truth. How frightened.
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I told myself that she was healthy and she was beautiful and she was ours, and that was all that mattered. And yet, I knew.
An instinct, of the purest, truest kind, in the way animals sense trouble in their midst. Secretly I would compare her with other babies—at the clinic, or at Mother and Baby clubs, or at the supermarket. Intelligence, yes—I never feared for her intellect—but rarely emotion.
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I never felt anything from her. She was hitting one pan repeatedly over and over, the sound ricocheting inside my skull, but just as I was mentally kicking myself for giving them to her, the noise suddenly stopped. Lovely porridge!
The Lies We Told by Camilla Way, Paperback | Barnes & Noble®
Be ready in a tick! When I turned, I felt a sudden searing pain in my eye and reeled backward in shock.
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The Lies We Told
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